Top 30 Signs You're Addicted to Poker
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We all enjoy a good joke once in a while, but when it comes to the game we love so much, we just can’t get enough.
That is why we’ve collected some of the best poker jokes for you in the subject of poker addiction, but it’s not that serious because it’s hilarious, funny and it’s here to make you laugh and feel good that you too may be addicted to the game of poker.
So, are you ready to find out the 30 signs for poker addiction? Here are the best poker jokes as for poker addiction and not a word about treatment.
Enjoy.
#1. You prefer to be interviewed for a job last, so you’ll have position over the other candidates.
#2. Every time you look at a vehicle’s registration plate, you try to make a winning hand of it.
#3. When you go to your boss at work and ask for a raise, you hear what he has to offer you and then you re-raise his offer.
#4. When your house is on fire and you can only save a single thing, you get your poker case and leave everything else to burn.
#5. When you’re at therapy with your psychologist, he asks you: “What’s your biggest fear?” and your answer is: “Set over set.”
#6. When you look at a restaurant’s menu and see the prices go up and get more expensive, it looks to you like a raise and re-raise pre-flop.
#7. When you can’t get an erection because sex, you think to yourself: “That’s okay, I’ll just use the short stack strategy.”
#8. When you try on a new pair of jeans, but then you think it may be a bit expensive, so your friend says: “Come on man, you pay more than that when you’re chasing a flush.”
#9. When you’re playing blackjack and get AJ off-suit, instead of being happy for winning you think to yourself: “I wish they were suited.”
#10. When you put a new ring you bought on your girlfriend’s finger and say “nice hand.”
#11. When you view everything bad that happens to you in life as a bad beat.
#12. When you’re staying till the end of the movie in the cinema even though you’re not enjoying it, because you’re plot-committed.
#13. When thinking about booking a room at the hotel, the main factor will be how close it is to the casino.
#14. When you’re stuck in traffic for 5 minutes and don’t move an inch with your car, you call for time.
#15. When someone talks about donkeys, sharks, fishes and whales, it’s not the animals themselves that come to mind, but your poker buddies.
#16. When you’re enjoying your Oreos, you split an Oreo cookie into two just to listen to the sound it makes.
#17. When you drop a cup in the kitchen and your wife yells at you: “Look what you’ve done, you broke my set.” And your answer is: “When did you start understanding poker?”
#18. When you’re at a wedding or a big event and think to yourself: “Boy, what a great field for a tournament.”
#19. When you prefer a poker game over getting laid.
#20. When you’re counting, you go 8, 9, 10, J, Q, K…
#21. When you come to a poker game at night wearing sunglasses, not for the poker face, but for the next morning sunrise.
#22. When you’re playing online poker with your sunglasses on.
#23. When you start to think that a bracelet would look good on you.
#24. When the sound of poker chips wake you up faster than an alarm clock.
#25. When you take a 5-minute break at work every hour, as if you’re playing a tournament.
#26. When the taxi driver asks $20 for the ride, you look into your wallet only to see you’re short, so you say $100 hoping he’ll fold.
#27. When your roleplaying in bed with your girlfriend means “being” Phil Laak and Jennifer Tilly.
#28. When your Pringles is Super Stack and you immediately think of an online tournament.
#29. When you’re walking down the street and see a smiley graffiti, you immediately think it is Happy Hour on Full Tilt Poker.
#30. When the word chipleader turns you on more than the word cheerleader.
If you show some of these signs and symptoms or more, you may be playing poker too much, but if you enjoy yourself who are we to judge, right?
Have more poker jokes to share with us? Can you think of other signs and symptoms for poker addiction so everyone can laugh and enjoy? Comment us, share it with us, let’s talk about it…and keep on laughing.
